ParisHilton

As many others with our celebrated obsession are apt to do, I successfully watched a horror film every day last month in honor of Halloween. This task of course required me to double my efforts to improve upon my one-horror-film-every-two-days agenda that I follow every other month of the year. I love this genre with an ardent fervor, but I am sorry to report that there are holes in my knowledge just like there are in anyone else's (except for Weinberg of course). For example, this project allowed for my first viewing of American Werewolf in London; freaking transcendent experience. But I am just as excited to explore the uncharted seas of schlock as I am to face down the legends.To wit, I offer you the much maligned House of Wax.

Let me start by reassuring you that I harbor no delusions that House of Wax is the greatest horror film ever made. Its flaws are visible from space. But I remember when this film hit our shelves at Blockbuster, back when I was but a counter jockey with aspirations of becoming the mechageek I am today, I wanted absolutely nothing to do with it. Two obstacles kept me from burning a free rental on this film: I had not seen the original with Vincent Price and the remake film starred the harbinger of all things evil known as Paris Hilton.

Hi. I'm Brian, and I am addicted to horror. As a member of the newest batch of horrorphiles here on Horror Squad, I thought I would hit the ground running with a celebration of demise! Like any horror fanatic worth his salt, I am striving to watch one new horror film everyday ... especially this month. I had been avoiding the House of Wax remake for years specifically because of its inclusion of Paris Hilton; much as I assume was the position of many of you. But the fact is that this is among the better horror remakes out there (yes, out of the gate I make a statement like that). Please send all hate mail to Scott Weinberg. Among several other high points, including bearing a striking resemblance to a great 1979 horror film called Tourist Trap, this film features one of the creepiest fates I have ever seen.

Jared Padalecki, whom at the time was probably convinced that his career was on the rise and his days of horror remakes were numbered, makes the mistake of crossing paths with an evil wax-amatician named Vincent (appropriately enough) who decides to use him to push the boundaries of modern art. He makes several pronounced cuts into Padalecki's body, but he doesn't kill him. Instead, he coats him with searing hot wax and puts him on display in his museum. There he sits, a vegetative, but still very much in agony, sculpture behind a grand piano. It's deliciously morbid how peaceful his exterior appears while he is clearly screaming with his eyes. The best part is when his buddy tries to wipe away the wax and ends up taking off a huge chunk of his face. Awesome.