syfy

Dinoshark isn't SyFy's only "killer mutant shark running amok" movie planned for this year. No, when you've got a concept as full of win as that one, you milk it for all it's worth. If the idea of a killer prehistoric dinosaur shark doesn't get you excited, then perhaps the idea of a shark merged with an octopus will...

Roger Corman (and his brand new honorary Oscar) will produce Sharktopus--which is a very descriptive title and should let anyone who reads it know what they're in for. Declan O'Brien is directing (he also helmed the awful Wrong Turn 3) and news has now emerged (thanks to Uncle Creepy and the Dread Central gang) that Eric Roberts has been cast in the lead role. Yes, Eric Roberts, Oscar winner for Runaway Train will be going mano y Sharktopus with the titular creature. Between Roberts and Corman, this is probably the most Oscar winners to ever work on a SyFy channel movie.

The actor will play a research scientist who creates a top secret weapon--the Sharktopus--to combat pirates. The beast is controlled by some sort of electrical implants. If you guessed they somehow stop working and Sharktopus winds up rampaging near a beach, you too could be a screenwriter.

Early word is that we'll see Sharktopus on SyFy sometime later this year. In the meantime, you can catch Dinoshark on Saturday night at 9 EST/8 CST.

Raging Sharks' title would indicate that this is a film about killer sharks, but sharks are only the subplot in this disastrous but fun film where aliens and a rescue mission are at the heart of the story. That is, if you can call it a story because I still don't think I know what the film was really about after watching it. If you're a fan of B level shark flicks then you know this doesn't matter.

The movie isn't quite sure what it wants to be, so there are a whole lot of cooks in the kitchen. And continuing in the tradition of shark movies, there are a lot of other movies being referenced: Jaws (duh), The Thing, Aliens, Leviathan, The Abyss and the list goes on and on. You would think a film that uses few (I think I counted one?) CGI sharks would be better than most, but it's not. The film is hastily edited with stock footage inter-cut with the actors looking pensive, blank, or running for their lives on a beach screaming.

[After the jump, feel more rage ... ]

I've always been a staunch, non-ironic supporter of the Syfy channel, but I'm well aware that I'm in the minority on that. Well, now all you Syfy-mockers should get down on your knees and give thanks to the Sharktopus and Dinoshark gods for Syfy's newest gift, Red, a re-imagining of Little Red Riding Hood starring the adorable Felicia Day. Don't be alarmed, that strange sound you hear is thousands of geeks simultaneously sighing at the thought of Day idly wandering a dark forest in a, well, little red riding hood.

How does Felicia Day casting news get any better, you ask? SCI FI Wire explains, "In the action-packed Red, Red (Day) brings her fiancé home, where he meets the family and learns about their business - hunting werewolves. He's skeptical until bitten by a werewolf. When her family insists he must be killed, Red tries saving him. Red also stars Kavan Smith (Stargate Atlantis) and Stephen McHattie (Watchmen). Red is produced by Angela Mancuso and Vesuvius Productions in association with Chesler Perlmutter Productions."

Felicia Day...hunting werewolves...with the star of Pontypool? You are far to kind to the legion of fans who love to hate you, Syfy.

What do a ghost, a werewolf and a vampire have in common? If you guessed a nice home in Bristol, you might be a fan of BBC Three's horror/drama series Being Human. For those genuinely terrified about the SyFy channel remake set to air this summer rest assured that a third season of the popular show has been approved by the network.

As Sci-Fi Wire reports, all three principal cast members - Aidan Turner, Russell Tovey and Lenora Crichlow are all signed on for the third season to reprise their roles as a vampire, werewolf and a ghost all sharing a flat in Bristol and attempting to lead normal lives. The third season, however, will see them change locations, moving from their home in Bristol to Wales following the climax of the second season, which is set to air this February.

Being Human's unique approach toward horror mythology has proven to be extremely popular, with the start of the second season seeing approximately 1.4 million viewers. Citing the creativity and excellent writing of the show, Ben Stephenson, Controller Drama Commissioning for the BBC had this to say about the show's third season and writer Toby Whithouse:

"BBC Three drama is all about allowing the singular imagination of a writer the room to flourish, and Toby's extraordinary creation of an emotionally rooted yet mythic world personifies this completely. I can't wait to see where Toby and Touchpaper Television's imaginations will take the story over another eight episodes."

Rob Pursey, the Executive Producer of Touchpaper Television has stated that season three will feature "startling new storylines and characters," and that plenty of online content will be made available between the two seasons.

The third season of Being Human will be produced by Phil Trethowan, with Rob Pursey and Beth Willis of BBC Wales serving as Executive Producers.

Despite the show being about a vampire, a werewolf, and a ghost that all share the same apartment, don't be alarmed if you haven't heard of the TV show "Being Human". It started off as a 6-episode series on Britain's BBC Three, where it proved successful enough for an 8-episode second season on BBC One, a channel with a far larger audience pool. While the second season has not yet aired in England, the first season has been enjoying a small run on BBC America, an offshoot of the Beeb that serves as a time-delayed Greatest Hits network for us Yanks not good enough to see the shows as they air.

Since "Being Human" focuses on three young co-ed supernaturals and their day-to-day exploits with trying to live normal lives while being so abnormal, it was only natural that the Syfy channel had been keeping an eye on it. Now everyone's favorite guilty-pleasure network has officially announced that they will be remaking the show for the States. Syfy has thrown down an opening commitment to 13 episodes, with the plan on debuting the show some time in the second half of 2010.

Ah, "Scare Tactics", the best "Ha-Ha, We fooled you into thinking you were going to die a horrible death" Reality TV show there is. It's gone through two hosts (Shannen Doherty and Stephen Baldwin) and a network re-branding since it started back in 2003, but now that "30 Rock" genius Tracy Morgan has the gig of show host, it's looking like a good time to play catch up with the first half of Season 3 when it comes out on DVD October 6th, a date that totally coincidentally just so happens to be the same day the second half of "Scare Tactics" Season 3 starts.

And in honor of the return of the reason why I will never, ever answer a Craig's List ad looking for a one-night-only job opportunity cleaning out a scientist's defunct laboratory, HorrorSquad has a clip from Scare Tactics Season 3 Part 1 - Uncensored and Too Hot for TV.

Oh, and if you're unfamiliar with "Scare Tactics", it goes a little something like this: Ghosts scare the crap out of You, Friend A knows this. Friend A volunteers You to Syfy, who then use the magic of actors and staged special effects to create a scenario in which we all get to laugh at You for being scared by ghosts. Just when You are about to pee your proverbial pants (usually), one of the actors lets You in on the hidden-camera set up, and then You proceed to slaughter Friend A in real life.

It's good times all around.

Foywonder of DreadCentral is one of Scott Weinberg's favorite schlock experts ... and he's now mine, and he should be yours too. He's out there 24/7, compiling the best and worst of B, C, and D cinema so that you and I can sleep at night with clean souls.

His latest bit of genius is a bitterly penned schedule of SyFy's Summer of Schlock. As everyone knows, SyFy (formerly SciFi) really prides itself on churning out numerous original "thrillers" such as Mansquito and Ice Spiders. This summer will be no exception, and SyFy has a steady schedule of new "classics" to keep you busy in the hottest months.

Kicking off the season is Sand Serpents, which airs on July 11. Serpents is a dash of Dune, Tremors and Black Hawk Down, as a small platoon of U.S. soldiers must escape their Afghanistan outpost and the giant worm-like creatures that are devouring everything in sight. Jason Gedrick stars as the inexperienced lieutenant who must lead his redshirts men to the rendezvous where they can be rescued by helicopter.

After that, you'll want to check out Hellhounds on July 19th. It's one of the classier offerings of the SyFy summer, partly because it was directed by the Rick Schroder, but also because it takes place in ancient Greece. Theron and Demetria are set to be united in classical matrimony, but the unlucky bride is poisoned before they can sacrifice some bulls to Zeus. Theron risks a journey into the Underworld to rescue her from Hades' lecherous clutches, but he won't just have the river Styx and Cerberus to contend with. In a twist right out of Greek drama, his best friend and battle companion is the very man who poisoned his bride.

Sharks, infestations, and undead racecar drivers round out the rest of the month, leading to the grand finale: High Plains Invaders. Clint Eastwood's supernatural western is re-imagined to star James Marsters as a gunfighter who must rescue a Western mining town from the giant, insectoid aliens who have stripped it of its uranium and its human inhabitants. If there's one I'm willing to brave (albeit with a cold Guinness), it's this one -- and after you watch the clip below, I think you might want to join in. We can't let Foywonder go into the darkness alone.